I pretty much missed Talk Like a Pirate Day. (Though, thankfully, my comic didn't.) There was no question of even uttering a halfhearted "yarr" at my new job.

I am now working on the 23rd floor of an office tower in the heart of downtown Edmonton, working for a corporation with a name so corporate that you can't even tell what sort of business they do just by hearing it. Law firm? Accountants? Professional assassins? Who knows??

I am their new "graphic designer". The quotation marks are because though I have a fairly nice set-up graphics wise, with all the latest Adobe toys to play with, all of the corporate branding has already been done and everything from the brochures to the flyers to the invitations to the corporate lunches (sorry, morale building nourishment sessions)has already long since been cast in stone. There's a forty page document describing the proper Pantones and spacing to use in all publications, right down to what sort of bullets are acceptable for use in a proposal. (Myriad or Times, with the possibility of certain Arial diamonds. Garamond is right out of the question.)

So what do I design, then? Not a whole lot. I'm less graphic designer, and more assembly line girl. Open file, insert .eps logos, update text, proof, convert to .pdf, rinse, repeat.

Is it a bad job? No. Not really. My key strokes are logged, so I can't check my email or take a break to surf the internet (not keeping up with my comic's forum is killing me!!), and I'm on the edge of cubicle city right by the main thoroughfare, so doodling is a no-no. There's not much to do but grind through the work, and man, is there ever a lot to grind through.

So, pros and cons? Pros: I'm kept busy, I'm paid well, I get my pick of all sorts of fancy teas from the break room, and the view out the windows of the executives' offices almost makes the bee-hive bearable. They look right over the river valley, and the early fall colors are breathtaking.

Cons: Jesus, it's been a long time since I've had to wear a suit to work. It feels...wrong. Like a blander version of me. Also - I can't tell the bosses apart. They seem to be identical clones in expensive suits and haircuts with very white teeth. I feel the urge to label them with different colored sticky notes.