Anyone who's never worn contacts or glasses will never be able to understand the joy of getting a new prescription filled.

It's like suddenly gaining a super power. The world is suddenly crisp, sharp, intense. Tiny twigs on distant branches spring into view, you can see textures up to three blocks away, and as your eyes adjust to the new, more powerful prescription, you feel as though you've grown several feet and are towering over a vast carpet with individually outlines specks of dust clinging to the woven fibers like small peasants that you can crush underfoot.

This feeling wears off after a week or so. So, if during the next little while I break out in dramatic poses or seem shocked that I'm actually kind of shorter than I thought, you'll know why.